Remembrance

I'll start the vulnerability, hope you all join in after this post:


When I close my eyes, I wonder if I'm seeing what you now see; an empty canvas awaiting fulfillment. When I think of the eternal, I wonder if I'll rest with you again. I hope that dreams are not the only filler for this sidewalks end. I want so badly to REALLY see and feel you again. How can I though, with only these visual displays of repeated imagery lost at the will of abundance inside the mind of projections.

When my eyes fill with salt and my glans begin to swell, the pain I feel subsides with the thought of your last solitude, and remorse for my sufferings settle in, at the glimpse of thought provoked aggetation of images of you, on your final exhale.

You could not have known the concepts of your reality, so we lived them through you. At such a young age, the curiosity of life and its abundant beauty lays itself infront of a mind wrapped up in its simplicity. You could not have known your existance to be as pure and affectionate as the one you so willing provoked upon us all. I could not have known how the importance of me has bled out with your last drip.

You loved me, and I felt it with every paw, in every stroke of your claw. You held me close and I embraced your trust with the pain of pleasure in the existance of your simple life. The way you'd burrow your head into my warmth, diluting the cold that slept inside my troubled mind; a place of hybernation, where eternally, you will rest.

Provoke me with absence, that you are, were, only short lived. And i'll reply: Life is existance and you were a rarity. Not because you were mine, and ours, but because your existance kept control of mine. You taught me to feel innocence again, the feeling we feel only as a child. You will forever be young: innocent, pure, simple, beautiful, kind, a wonder, gentle and rough; Alive.

I will always appreciate you as a being, as a wonder, as a fortune, as a companion, as a love, as a pleasure, as my one and only, as my best, my best part of knowing something real, as a whole part of me.

Goodbye, goodnight, good being in your life. Godspeed my lovely, and may remembrance be only the start of never forever, forgetting; the impact on my life as I know it and will continue to. I hold you once more on this once before, blank canvas, knowing now that it is filled with thoughts of you. My lips, my epidermic, my embrace, my warmth, are now and forever on this page. Your solitude lays with my soul on this canvas of words forever; forever me with you. You never died alone, for I have and will always be with you in minds eye, my lovely Fiona.

Lets rest together baby... you eternally, that way I suffer the waking life so you wont have to.

Stuck IN the other side, your one and only, -Pappa.